This deployment is killing me... yeah okay, so maybe I don't let it show ofton. But it is. I miss Jeff terribly, it's getting harder and harder to do things without him. Sitting on the couch reading a book I just wish he was there to hold me while I read. Putting the boys to bed... wish he was here to kiss them good night, and to help comfort them when they are scared. While I love my boys, I love their father just as much. And the last 6 months literally feel like it's been forever since he left. Now I realize I may have seen him twice since leaving in Sept, but let me tell you that seeing your husband for a couple days here and a week at Christmas does not make anyone feel better.
So what brought this post on... a CD of pictures. Jeff has been lifting weights in Afghanistan, so I told him, purely for the reason of seeing the change... to send me some pics shirtless. So I got the CD yesterday, and seeing my shirtless hubby (OMG serious drool worthiness pictures) looking oohhh so good, has be missing him even more. But while I was looking at these pictures he is not smiling in very many of them. Actually I think he only smiled in one. And he sent us a video of his room... make me miss him even more still because I want to be in that room with him, or any room with him. I don't care where, I just WANT YO BE WITH HIM! Sitting there free to talk to him anytime I want and not just when he can call.
Whats worse is we aren't even sure WHEN he will be home. He have a kind of idea, but the unit has not told them a for sure when, supposedly they will be telling them when they will be coming home in a couple weeks. I HOPE!
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